Happy Monday Tune, The Bluetones - Autophilia

Be there then

"An extraordinary man can never have an ordinary day."

I'm really hoping you don't recognise that quote. 

But if you do, it most likely means that, like me, you queued up outside a local branch of Our-price records at midnight, back in the Summer of '97, awaiting the release of an album so hyped, it was sure to collapse under the weight of it's own bombast. 

An LP (look it up kids) dripping in so much swagger, it would take good few days for you to see through the pretentious 8 minute guitar solos.....and realise it was shite.

But I digress.

Welcome, all 2 of you, to the inside of my head.

This is not a guide to your life.

This is not a self help blog.

The thoughts, rants, moans, groans, and gripes of an average nobody who just didn't quite excel at any one thing in his life will be published here weekly....just like pretty much every blog out there then. 

I will be allowing you to point, stare and tut in my general direction, with all the indifference that you'd show a big white elephant in the room...dressed as a homeless guy.

"Jack of all trades, master of none" is a cliché I've always had an affection for, and today, it sums up my personal self-belief pretty nicely.

Over my thirty-&#£@ years, I have tried and failed to reach a tangible degree of competence in the following activities;

Music, Magic, Dating, Drawing, Painting, Acting, Presenting, Skiing, Kite skiing, Kite surfing Windsurfing, errr surf Surfing, Sailing, Wrestling, Writing,  Singing, Composing, Guitar playing, Piano playing, Harmonica playing, Ukulele playing, Skateboarding, Snowboarding, Wakeboading, Bumboarding, Drinking, University, and Sex.

Come to think of it, the idea of combining the final 3 probably led to their failure, hmmmm, something to consider.

In the coming 12 months I intend to enhance my life by trying not to add to that list and make a brand new list.  A list of things that i intend to surpass expectations, and actually bother to get good at.

So please join me, I am sure I'll be good at something...I'm just not quite sure what that is.

This is not a guide to your life.

This is not a self help blog.

This is just me, Jim, and these are my adventures in mediocrity.

Coming next week, Adventure 1: Journey back into dating